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NEWS & FORTEANA

Shark fans thrilled by frilled shark

By guest editor Richard Caldwell

Posted November 14, 2017
Frilled shark thrills shark fans
Funny-lookin' geezer, ain't he? A frilled shark yesterday. © Awashima Marine Park/Getty Images

Richard Caldwell ponders the appearance of a living fossil off the coast of Portugal.



Earlier this year, a frilled shark was netted off the Algarve coast of Portugal, which has portions of the scientific community excited as fossil records prove this excruciatingly elusive species has actually been swimming oceanic depths for 80m years.

Give or take a millennium.

Known around the water cooler as the Chlamydoselachus anguineus, the full-grown frilled shark tends to be about as long as the average man is tall and scientists believe it has evolved little or not at all from its ancestry of the Cretaceous Period.

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SEX TAPE
While living specimens have been reported since the 19th century, they are rarely captured on film.

Which proves how few people honestly viewed that Kardashian sex tape from aways back.

But what exactly prompted this rarity to surface up for a cameo in today's headlines?

Could the internet's massive, 8,000-ft (2.4-km) deep, hundreds-of-thousands-of-miles long undersea cables have driven it bonkers, like a refrigerator that runs with just enough white noise to drive bachelors to weigh the pre-dawn hours of a day?

Might the long-rumoured Russian tectonic cannon have blasted underwater quakes in the deepest trenches to reawaken Elder gods?

Or could Time Warner, eager to distract from its share of sex harassment scandals, have pumped untold millions into some bizarre genetic cloning fiasco to serve as a pretty nifty marketing gimmick for their upcoming Aquaman feature film?

Or... what if it was all of the above?

Deep inside, as deep as the deepest of oceans even, I think we all know the answer.


Cheers, Richard. Handsome buggers, aren't they? Makes you wonder why they're so camera shy. And on that note, here's a link to the original Sic Noticias TV report that first broke the story to the world. Mind you, unless you speak Portuguese some of the details might be a tad hard to grasp so what follows now is some English-language reportage from ITN that was released 10 years back when one of those fantastic fishy things was captured on camera off Japan.




And sticking with the fishy theme, here's Ween with a couple of tracks off their flippin' excellent 1997 album The Mollusk.







See also Van Gogh's added realism, posted 13/11/17.


Richard Caldwell
used to write for the now sadly defunct New Comics Day. Fortunately, his writings still abound elsewhere on the interweb, such as on his flippin' ace blog that you are strongly advised to check out here.


Engage with the Rake & Herald on FaceBook here and Twitter here. Better still, buy a T-shirt here.


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