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Shampoo? Shove it up yer jinker!

By deputy chief hack Charles L'Amour

Posted June 13, 2012
85 year old woman keeps hair blonde by washing it with ash
Blonde sensation: Granny Ani from Nizne Ruzbac. © Charles L'Amour

Why spunk quids on poncey hair care products when you can burn some paper instead?


An 85-year-old granny is baffling experts with her incredible locks of flowing, golden hair.

Granny Ani from Nizne Ruzbac in Slovakia says she has never had it coloured and has never been to a hairdresser.

Instead, the proud grandmother of three reveals her secret is to wash her Barnet in specially burned ashes once a week.

"I have a special recipe that beats any shampoo," she says.

"I burn paper and then put the ashes into water and then dunk my head in it."

And the best way to keep a healthy head of hair is to pluck it, not cut it, she continues.

"I’ve always had long hair and when I was little I wasn't allowed to use scissors so I started plucking it with tweezers instead when I wanted a bit less of it."

"I've done that ever since and look at it now."

"The hair is in remarkably good condition, both in terms of texture and length," says hair specialist Gabriella Rohalova.

"It's quite remarkable," she remarks.

Stay tuned for more health and beauty tips next month when booze editor Miltov Lamprey sticks his head in a bucket of shit to cure his dandruff.


The original version of this article first appeared in Cor Blimey!. It appears here now because they still owe us for that liver we lent them at Christmas, the tightwads.


See also The best bar in town, posted 1/6/12.



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