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NEWS & FORTEANA

Five years for Cornish slurry wanker

By rag picker Reg Pecker

Posted May 31, 2014
rag picker

Cornish cow pat perv banged up for death-threat reign of manure-based masturbatory terror.


Notorious Cornish slurry wanker David Truscott has been slapped with a five-year stretch in chokey for threatening to kidnap and then burn to death a family of farmers who tried to stop him tossing off in their cows' anal excreta.

According to Sky News, the 43-year-old sex maniac "repeatedly rolled around naked in liquid manure, called 'slurry', at a farm he had developed an obsession with in Redruth, Cornwall", targeting Woodbury House Farm "over an eight-year period to satisfy his bizarre craving".

After initially stealing cow pats with which to pleasure himself, his "behaviour escalated so that Truscott regularly entered the farm in search of slurry".


BOLLARDS
Oddly enough, the farm's owners, Clive and Jackie Roth, got a tad miffed with all this and "erected bollards and removed slurry in a bid to deter him" from choking his chicken in their bovine bum gravy.

This got the scat wanker well radge and thus, in a bid to wreak revenge, he "repeatedly set fire to the Roths' shed, tractor, enclosures and hay" and in so doing killed at least one calf.

Whether he then spunked all over the carcass remains unclear.

However, I wouldn't put it past him, the rum c--t, that's for sure.

Either way, the beak, Judge Philip Wassall, was unimpressed by his antics, telling Exeter Crown Court that his actions had had a "substantial" impact on the Roths, whose lives he had "blighted for years".

Truscott, who apparently suffers from "autism spectrum disorder", will undergo mental health treatment while in the clink and will remain on licence for a further five years following his release.


PREVIOUS FORM
This is not the first time his predilection for knocking one off in poopy plop has led to prosecution, with Truscott having "previously received a 16-week sentence for stripping naked in the cattle pen, releasing the cattle and climbing into the slurry spreader".

After being freed, he subsequently "returned to the farm and sat naked in cow muck" and was gaoled "for a further 20 weeks".

Then in September 2011, he was handed a two-year prison sentence "after police caught him naked in a field harassing the Roth family".

Meanwhile, a 2013 International Business Times (IBT) report states that in 2004 a court "heard that on one occasion Truscott entered a milking parlour, stripped down to his underpants and climbed into a huge vat of manure for solo sex".

He was then gaoled for three years in 2005, it continues, "after admitting causing three fires at the farm".

During that particular trial, his defence counsel described Truscott as a "sad, isolated, peculiar man with peculiar habits".

You don't f--king say.


Read the full Sky News story here and the full IBT report here.


Hat tip: Wolfgang Bang.


See also Nicked for trolling herself, posted 6/2/14.


Reg Pecker
is an automated news aggregator made out of wood.



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