Saturday March 25, 2017
R&H on temporary shutdown while we work on something big; fears of nuclear meltdown unfounded.
The Rake & Herald is on temporary shutdown while we try to fix a leak in the main reactor.
Citizens are advised not to be alarmed.
Nuclear power is safe.
There has never been a nuclear accident in the history of the world.
Go about your business as usual.
Albeit indoors with all doors and windows firmly closed while you await the all-clear to sound.
Normal service will resume in a week or two.
Either way, we will hopefully have an important announcement to make when we return.
And for all her friends on FaceBook who might be wondering, yes, Sandi Toxic has been abducted by aliens.
Cue patriotic music.
End of message.
The above video is embedded here on the tune-tastic Rake & Herald by the Commission for Public Safety from zttrecords' YouTube channel, which you can check out here. Do not be alarmed. Everything is under control.
MORE FROM TRAVEL & STUFF
That Rake blokes goes for a walk round Poznan, a Polish city with its very own fart club.
Nothing compares to the peace and tranquility of the Arabian Desert, something best enjoyed in a 4x4 while haring around some dunes like a loon.
SHARE THE RAKE
US brewery numbers surpass historic high of 1873, latest BA stats reveal.
After a three-week hiatus, the world's favourite online bum rag is back and, what's more, it now stinks even worse than ever before.
It's a well known fact that beer pairs well with many foods. Such as three pints of turkey gravy. All mixed together and then necked in under five minutes.