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Meet our new appointment


Posted October 23, 2017
steven rearguard joins the rake and herald from the fifth dimension
Best Venusian for the job: Steven Rearguard in human form yesterday. © Ignatius Rake

Fifth-dimensional driving instructor appointed.

The Rake & Herald has announced the appointment of Steven Rearguard as new provisional driving instructor to the domestic fleet.

His duties will include the execution of all hand-break turns.

"I'm thrilled to be appointed," says Steven, himself a fifth-dimensional entity who has been appointed on his merits serving with the Ashtar Command.

His point of reference for joining the Rake & Herald was an article we wrote.

More later.

Steven started his career on Venus in a realm unperceivable to humans without eyes to see beyond the third dimension.

"Sadly, there are far too many of these creatures on your planet," he says.

"My job as driving instructor will be to nurture souls with the ability to go beyond the physical."

"We will make contact with you in your sleep."

T-shirts now available.

Transmission ends.

let's get shitfaced t-shirt
Click the pic: to see the full range of Steven Rearguard tees and clag on offer. © Ignatius Rake

See also Join our cult!, posted 1/8/17.

Engage with the Rake & Herald on FaceBook here and Twitter here. Better still, buy a T-shirt here.

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