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Dalí's incorruptible moustache

By guest editor Richard Caldwell

Posted August 02, 2017
salvador dali and his incorruptible moustache
Wicked whiskers: Dalí (left) and ocelot (right). © Ignatius Rake

Surrealist painter's tache still intact after 28 years in the tomb.

The at-times Associated Press is reporting that tomb-raiding grave-robbers in Spain have unearthed bits and pieces of surrealist painter, filmmaker and Chupa Chups logo devisor Salvador Dalí, purportedly to learn by means of science whether or not all of his baby mamas are lying.

While the remnants of his remains may, following standard DNA tests (a round of rocks-paper-scissors and a reading of tea leaves), enable a potential heir to his estate in the form of a 61-year-old tarot reader to claim a rightful piece of his pie, exhuming the embalmed artist from his evidently temporary resting place in the Dalí Theatre and Museum in the Catalan town of Figueres has already revealed something arguably even more commendable.

The man's enviable moustache is indeed intact.

Salvador Dali the persistence of memory
The Persistence of Memory: Or moustaches as the case may be. © Salvador Dalí

That's right, the same enviable, pencil-thin mass of tache which lured many a lithe and lissom muse to his bedchambers to begin with is still resplendent after 28 years of physical death.

As Sandrine Pelissier earlier reported: "Dalí's moustache was a slender type, waxed with the tips curled upward."

"He once said that this style of moustache was influenced by the Spanish painter Diego Velázquez."

"It was voted most the 'best-known moustache of all time' by Britain's Daily Telegraph, which polled 14,144 British men in honour of Movember in November 2010."

However, it is not clear whether Dalí's spirit continues to wax it regularly.

Although the evidence suggests this may well be the case.

Or maybe it's just that even 'living' hair consists of inert keratin and the last lot of wax Dalí applied before shuffling off this mortal coil still retains its preservative qualities.

Who knows?

Salvador Dali the persistence of memory
He also did some great sculptures: Retrospective Bust of a Woman (1933). © Salvador Dalí

Before the Brexit ordeal follows through, the Beard Liberation Front is expected to claim ownership of the stylised whiskers.


Because, fucking hell, although in light of Diamond Comic Distributors CEO Steve Geppi's previous and notably disastrous attempts to have the skull of fellow artist Jack Kirby (insured by Lloyd's of London) placed upon the Christie's auction block, it can be presumed the facial pubes will otherwise be stroked in private.

Beardists around the world have been set aflame by the news, with Derby escapee, illustrator of bearded lady amazons and fierce beardism advocate Liam Sharp (yet another artist), giving the news a passing nod.

The curlicue whiskers of history's finest surrealist are quickly attaining celestial infamy unto themselves and will soon be adopted as the patron saint of the beardism movement at large if this immodest reporter has any say in the matter.

Cheers, Richard, but the thought of a bunch of shaver-shy shaggy-chinned hipsters getting their post-modern mits all over the great man's tache fills me with abject horror. So, to calm my nerves at least, here's Dalí describing exactly what he does/did on What's My Line back in the 1950s. But could he use his moustache to paint? Watch and learn, folks. Watch and learn.

News of Dalí's incorruptible tache comes shortly after the great man was inducted into the Rake & Herald Hall of Heroes and Heroines. And to prove it, here's the T-shirt, which you can buy along with a whole load of other stuff, including bags and shower curtains, here.

rake clag t-shirts and more
Click the pic: to see the full range of Dalí-themed tees and clag on offer. © Ignatius Rake

See also Love online, posted 27/7/17, and Paris, art and ants, posted 23/5/14.

Richard Caldwell
used to write for the now sadly defunct New Comics Day. Fortunately, his writings still abound elsewhere on the interweb, such as on his flippin' ace blog that you are strongly advised to check out here.

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