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EATING & DRINKING

Quim by night

By pre-op rugged outdoors type Quim Dexter

Posted November 03, 2015
quim six times a night

Bunnies beware because Quim's got a new night sight.



Darkness.

Mankind's primal fear.

What lurks in the great unknown and sparks such abject terror?

The absence of our primary sense renders us helpless as our imagination conjures up every alpha predator that stalked mankind from our earliest days on the African savannah.

One slight flaw in this scenario.

I'm not going to be a man for much longer once the gender reassignment clinic approves the operation.


A DASHING FIGURE
While painting my toenails and wearing my favourite nightie one morning, I had the joy of receiving a parcel that I had been longing for.

Rather than containing the usual hormonal hellbrew to bulk out certain areas and make others wither, it was my long-awaited new night vision scope.

The Yukon Photon XT 6.5x50 certainly cut a dashing figure.

Far less bulky and more svelte than my last foray into the world of night terror, it avoided both the high sightline and weight penalty of the preceding model I owned.


"Getting the correct eye relief and cheek weld reminded me of a Turkish bath in Soho I used to frequent..."




FRISKY AS A TORCH SINGER
I was as frisky as a torch singer at a cabaret as it took the standard 30 mm scope mounts reserved for more usual optics and married it to my trusty BSA Superten.

Getting the correct eye relief and cheek weld reminded me of a Turkish bath in Soho I used to frequent, such was the ease it was to mount.

After shouldering the rifle and making some small adjustments, I determined to finish flicking the duster around and head rangeward to get a rough zero as soon as possible.

After donning diamanté wellies, hotpants and a hot pink mohair jumper, I settled down to figure out its zeroing.

It has no external adjusters, relying on two buttons and a left/right rocker dial.

On/off and infrared (IR) is controlled by the top one and the menu options and zeroing by the bottom and rocker.

Blimey!

Six reticules to choose from.

Ain't I a lucky gal!


"I slipped off the safety like Danny La Rue slipping out of a taffeta ball gown."




AN ODD AFFAIR
Zeroing is an odd affair, rather like that one I experienced in Tunisia on holiday last year.

I'll never look at a camel in the same way again.

With the flip-up lens cap on during daylight, you fire one shot off the bipod and move the crosshairs to the point of impact by selecting an X/Y axis.

Rough zero acquired after about 15 shots, I settled down with a nail file to tidy my mits and waited for darkness to follow.

After dark I had ironed out any parallax error and set a solid 35 m zero.

Yeah!

This is more like it!

Setting off at a brisk mince I came to my permissions.

I silently slipped over the gate, undogged the rifle and switched on.

Bunnies, sarge!

Dozens of 'em!

I crept slowly towards the first pair and at what seemed like an age brought the rifle to my shoulder and slipped off the safety like Danny La Rue slipping out of a taffeta ball gown.


GOOD DRILLS, MADAM!
Bleedin 'ell!

Even on the lowest setting the on-board IR made the light reflected from bunnies' eyes look like their peepers were abso-facking-lutely HUGE.

It took all my years of experience to gauge the aim point and squeeze off the shot – wallop!

One dahn.

Reload, crack!

And another!

Blimey!

Good drills, madam!

Two bunnies in and the rest had scarpered, along with a badger that was acting like I was going to plug him up the wrong 'un.

Relax mate, the chemicals mean it's only for show now.


"Ooooh, I like prone action."




UNLADYLIKE SWEARING
I didn't linger after picking the first two up, moving on to a field that hadn't been cut that was riddled with the long-eared blighters.

It was wild with them, porpoising over the long grass to get underground as I headed to a high vantage point next to a telegraph pole.

One paused a second too long and was despatched.

Only, could I find him?

Yeah, after some unladylike swearing and walking in circles for five minutes.

I settled down to wait.

After 20 minutes, two came out at some 45-50 m away.

From my vantage point and sitting, I selected the scaled-down mil dot reticule and chose the dot down from the crosshair.

One fell like a whipcrack and his pal stood up for a better look.

Off to the pie in the sky for him as well.

Blimey, five in!

Finding the slain was easy this time and I decided to move to where the grass was shorter for some prone action.

Ooooh, I like prone action.


CLOSELY CROPPED
Setting down on the closely cropped meadow was sweet.

I knew my arrival had sent Peter Rabbit scampering, so I waited patiently for them to reappear.

As I scanned the hedgeline every five minutes, I noticed an eye brightly shining from inside its burrow.

I settled back to estimate range – difficult in the dark – and as I tried to figure it out a suicidal bunny ambled into my sight line and paused!

Needless to say, I centred the crosshairs, pulled the trigger and downed him.

Well, some people have all the luck!

Unlike me when I discovered my op had been postponed again.

Always a bridesmaid, never a bride.

Good shooting, sexybods.

Quim Dexter


See also Pheasant and wood pigeon in cider, posted 19/3/15.


Quim Dexter
lives in a bender down Luxulyan Valley. If he met Bear Grylls, he'd "cook his innards and use the rest for a dress".


Top pic: Ignatius Rake using original images by Quim Dexter.



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