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EATING & DRINKING

Mmm Mmm's Top 10

By engobulation editor Tracy 'Mmm Mmm' Goode

Posted January 13, 2016
Megatoad and Miki win Nathan's
A year to remember: 2015 saw Megatoad (left) and Miki (right) chomp to Nathan's glory. © MLE

Tracy 'Mmm Mmm' Goode counts down his Top 10 competitive eating moments of 2015.



NB. Mmm Mmm originally filed the following story a couple of weeks ago. However, as all here at the Cornwall head office were passed out in a hedge having drunk twice our combined body weight in cheap cans of Sullington, we have only just now gotten round to posting it. We apologise to all for this delay and promise that we will now find someone to blame, sack, re-hire then sack again for good measure. Sorry. Bloody hacks, eh?


As I sit on my couch watching A Charlie Brown Christmas, the station keeps advertising New Year's Rockin' Eve, (which I'm sure I will be watching also from my couch next week).

It brings to mind how at this time of year everyone and everything has a Top 10 list counting down the highs and lows of the past year.

This begs the question that no one has asked: What are the Top 10 Moments of Competitive Eating?

So here it is, ladies and gentlemen, the Top 10 Highs and Lows of 2015 in Competitive Eating:


10) SWEET TOOTH JOINS MLE
Former All Pro Eating (APE) star/YouTube competitive eating legend Matt 'Sweet Tooth' Cohen signed with Major League Eating (MLE) in 2015.

Sweet Tooth's first MLE event was on September 20 at the Oktoberfest Zinzinnati World Bratwurst Eating Championship in Cincinnati, Ohio, where he placed fifth with a gut count of 19 bratwursts in 10 minutes.


9) MATT STONIE'S YOUTUBE CHANNEL HITS A MILLION
It's been a HUGE 2015 for Matt 'Megatoad' Stonie!

At the time of writing (24/12/15), his YouTube channel sits at 1,062,981 subscribers and growing.

One million subscribers is a great accomplishment and helps bring more legitimacy to competitive eating and proves how interested people are in the sport.


8) MICHELLE LESCO WINS RIBFEST
On June 12, MLE's #7 ranked eater 'The Queen of Nice' Michelle 'Cardboard Shell' Lesco stopped being the bridesmaid and was finally the bride at Ribfest Chicago's Ribmania Eating Championship, winning her first non-qualifier contest by eating 3.2 lbs (1.5 kg) of ribs in 8 minutes.

In so doing, she beat off reigning champ Miki Sudo, who ate 2.9 lbs to place second.


Michelle 'Cardboard Shell' Lesco
Rib warrior: Cardboard Shell with her cheque and cup. © Ribfest Chicago


7) EATERS EAT GOAT FOR GOOD CAUSE
September 22, competitive eaters Pat 'Deep Dish' Bertoletti, Tim 'Gravy' Brown, LA Beast, Notorious B.O.B. and Takeru Kobayashi joined forces to devour a 40-lb goat for one of the most noblest of all the causes: breaking the Chicago Cubs Curse.

While sadly the effort didn't work, the quintet did garnish national headlines.

Possible 2016 attempt: two goats and Steve Bartman.


6) MIKI SUDO REPEATS AT CONEY ISLAND
If anyone was under the illusion that MLE's #1 ranked female eater was just a flash in the pan and her 2014 victory at the Nathan's Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest was just beginner's luck, they would have been made fools by Miki's first title defence.

Miki ate 38 hot dogs and buns (HDBs) to 31 HDBs by Sonya 'Black Widow' Thomas, the former champ.

This compares to Miki's 2014 total of 34 HDBs.


5) LA BEAST BRINGS BACK CRYSTAL PEPSI
In the 1990s Pepsi made a clear cola called Crystal Pepsi that had a short shelf life (1992-93).

Having previously bought and consumed 20-year-old Crystal Pepsis he'd found on sites like eBay, LA Beast last year spearheaded a push to have Pepsi bring back this throwback beverage by having his social media followers call the company; hiring signs by the Pepsi corporate offices; and even recording a song in honour of the drink.

In November, Pepsi announced the return of Crystal Pepsi.

In December, Pepsi had a drawing for a limited release (writers note: I soooooo won a six pack, be jealous!).

Crystal Pepsi is now set for a full return this coming July.


4) FURIOUS PETE ILLNESS/RECOVERY/BOOK
Competitive eating's 'Furious' Pete Czerwinski had already gone through so much to begin with and overcame each hurdle, being a true inspiration to his 2m+ YouTube followers.

However, 2015 was another roller coaster for him, finding out in August that the cancer he had beaten the previous year had returned.

After undergoing treatment again in November, he announced he was once again cancer-free.

That same month, he also released his biography Stay Hungry.

We here at the Rake & Herald eagerly await our autographed copies.


3) RIP STEPHANIE TORRES
The competitive eating world took a hard hit in September with the sudden death of female eating pioneer Stephanie 'Xanadu' Torres.

Stephanie was one of the first female superstars of the sport.

She competed with MLE, APE and independently.

Stephanie was a talented, creative, free spirit who is, and will continue to be, greatly missed.


Stephanie 'Xanadu' Torres
RIP Stephanie Torres: Xanadu prepares to eat in 2013. © Tim Cain


2) DEEP DISH TOPS MOLLY
Wing Bowl XXIII in January saw Deep Dish Bertoletti put an end to Molly Schuyler's nearly two-year undefeated streak.

It was one of the closest results in Wing Bowl history: Deep Dish with 444 chicken wings to Molly's 440.

At time of writing, neither are listed as contestants for Wing Bowl XXIV this coming February.


1) STONIE ROASTS CHESTNUT
Of course this was going to be #1 for 2015!

July 4, 2015, Matt 'Megatoad' Stonie dethroned the eight-time reigning Nathan's champ and erstwhile MLE #1 Joey 'Jaws' Chestnut.

Stonie took the coveted Mustard Belt by beating Joey and the rest of the field by eating 62 HDBs in 10 minutes.

Stonie's first title defence on July 4, 2016 will certainly be one to watch.


Chief hack's note: Cheers, Mmm Mmm. A pretty good list if you ask me. However, I notice you didn't mention the single biggest event to shake the world of competitive eating last year, viz yours truly coming fifth in the UK qualifiers for the 2016 Battle of Big Eaters. Although, to be honest, I'm getting pretty sick of all the autograph hunters so really I'm quite glad you kept quiet about it.

Anyway, as for the 2016 Nathan's final, yep, that's probably gonna be quite a tough tooth-off. So, to get you all in the mood, here's Megatoad masticating his way to victory at the corner of Surf and Stillwell this past July 4. Happy New Year, y'all. And once again, sorry for the delay in running this article. Personally, I blame Sandi Toxic, the useless gunt. Sandi, consider yourself sacked. Again.





The above vid is embedded on the food-fighting-tastic Rake & Herald from Featured Patriots' YouTube channel, which you can check out here.


See also Fink Beats the Stomach!, posted 24/6/15, among others.


Tracy 'Mmm Mmm' Goode
is a former Major League Eating gurgitator with some damn fine taste in music. The Rake & Herald is honoured to have him write for us. Check out his YouTube channel here.




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