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Kobayashi keeps PIE crown

By editorial assistant Sandi Toxic

Posted September 17, 2012
Takeru 'Kobi' Kobayashi pizza
Kobayashi: The man can eat. (Check bottom for credit)

Takeru 'Kobi' Kobayashi has reaffirmed his right to wear his pizza eating robes of office at the Third Annual Pizza PIE Eating Competition in Canada.

The Japanese eating phenomenon, who revolutionised the world of competitive eating when he wolfed down 50 dogs and buns at the 2001 Nathan's Famous Fourth of July International Hot Dog Eating Contest thus effectively doubling the previous record of 25.5, has once more proven his masticatory mettle by ploughing through 40 slices of pizza in 12 minutes at the PIE – Wood Fire Pizza Joint in Barrie, Ontario.

Sixty-seven words.

Beat that for an opening sentence.

Anyway, in munching his way to pole position, Kobi not only picked up a purse worth C$3,000 (£1,900), but also retained his Pizza PIE Eating crown for a third year running.

Not that it is was a walk in the park for the 34-year-old champion chomper, mind, with Jamie 'the Bear' McDonald giving him a right royal run for his money with a silver-winning tally of 35 slices.

"I of course wanted to win but was satisfied with keeping it close," a post-match Bear told the Rake & Herald via the magic of the interweb.

"Knowing what 35 took, Kobi has my respect for hitting 40."

While at press time the full results were still awaited, we understand from the Bear that 'Furious' Pete Czerwinski came third with 25 slices.

Meanwhile, Stephanie 'Xanadu' Torres is believed to have notched up a total somewhere in the high teens.

However, this remains to be confirmed.

Ditto her placing.

Likewise, it is not known how former sumo wrestler Emmanuel 'Tiny' Yarborough, officially recognised by the Guinness Book of Records as the largest athlete in the world, fared but we hope he enjoyed himself and sticks with competitive eating, officially recognised by the Rake & Herald as the greatest sport in the world.

"Hats off to Kobi," says Rake & Herald fashion editor, London cabbie and self-appointed competitive eating pundit Kok Wang.

"He really is phenomenal."

"However, the man with the biggest smile on his chops today/yesterday depending on what time zone you're in must be Jamie 'the Bear' McDonald."

"When he emailed us yesterday/the day before yesterday he said he was hoping to scoff at least 30 slices."

"Well, he's pissed all over that so he must be well chuffed."

"Today's/yesterday's chow-down was also his first face-to-face eat-off with 'Furious' Pete, who he done up like a kipper."

"Mind you, in 'Furious' Pete's defence, he's apparently had to put his usual training regime on hold on account of an upcoming photo shoot for, so in fairness his stomach capacity may well have dipped a bit."

"And let's face it, when you're scoffing 14" pizzas that weigh the best part of half a kilo a throw, stomach capacity is gonna be pretty fackin' important."

"Especially as you're also gonna need to slosh down a fair old drop of liquids just to stop all that crust and malarkey caking up your gizzard."

"After all, this ain't oysters."

"Which is a pity really 'cos they get to knock back Guinness on the stage at Hillsborough."

Expect an update once we know the full results.

Until then, a big pat on the back to all the gurgitators who took part and also the organisers, PIE, who the Bear describes in a twittery tweet tweet thing not actually aimed at us but which we'll quote anyway as having "put on a fantastic contest".

Right, gotta go.

Kok scares me when he isn't slurring.


Firstly, with North America now on the same day of the calendar as this bit of Europe, we're glad to report that we can now simply refer to the Third Annual Pizza PIE Eating Competition as having taken place in Canada yesterday.

Although if you're reading this in Tonga, the 12-minute gobathon will have happened the day before that.

Secondly, as kinda sorta promised earlier, we can now provide you with a results update courtesy of a number of interwebular sources.

These include the top-notch EatFeats website; the Twitter feed of a person by the name of Lara Elizabeth; and a Toronto newspaper called the Star, which also has a load of well tasty photos of the event here.

I particularly like the one of Kobi tucking into a Porchetto Pizza 60 minutes after ramming 40 slices of Margherita down his trap.

Hey, a man's gotta eat, y'know.

Anyway, without further ado, here are what at this present point in time appear to be pretty much the full results and prizes:

1) Takeru 'Kobi' Kobayashi (40 slices, viz 10 14" pizzas; C$3,000);

2) Jamie 'the Bear' McDonald (35; C$1,000);

3) 'Furious' Pete Czerwinski (25; C$500);

4) Jessie Kankula (20);

5) Stephanie 'Xanadu' Torres (19);

6) Craig Reid (15);

=7) Lara Martin (11);

=7) Emmanuel 'Tiny' Yarborough (11);

9=) Darrell Staveley (10);

9=) Brian Kirkpatrick (10);

11) Craig Ross (6).

NB. There appear to be a few discrepancies, with the Star reporting at one point that the Bear gulletised 34 slices and Furious Pete 27.

Similarly, while the same newspaper reports that Tiny, also referred to as 'Manny', notched up 11 slices, Lara Elizabeth has him down as scoffing 10 and placing eighth.

Not that we're nit-picking or anything, mind.

Big ups to all three sources, I say.

There's also a lovely little vid produced by FlyPress Films, which we've taken the liberty of embedding for your pleasure.

It doesn't show the whole chow-down but it's very well produced and a damned sight easier to stomach than the 'home movies' Kok punts out down the Legion for a fiver.

Right, gotta go.

The pizza's arrived.

Pie Wood Fire PIzza Joint - Third Annual Pizza Eating Competition Highlight Video from FlyPress Films on Vimeo.

See also A bear, a sumo and a lot of PIE, posted 15/9/12.

Picture credit

Top and thumb: Takeru Kobayashi back in 2007 by Nate 'Igor' Smith.

For licensing information click the above link.

(Update same day)

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